I am sick today and therefore skipping curch.
One thing I struggle with sometimes is paying tithing. I know I need to and I know it is the right thing to do. but sometimes I can't help but feel a tad greedy,especially right now, because I really want to buy some Alexander Henry apples and pears fabric. And I AM going to pay my tithing.I will not let myself be greedy. I just feel like, this fabric was hard to find and I really want it and I can still get some, just not as much as if I kept that tithing money. But honestly, I would feel guilty. And how would I tell Chris that I spend his tithing money on fabric? Yeah, would not be a cool thing to do. So I will get a little bit of fabric, and next week ,hopefully, I will still be able to find somemore. Really, I looked all over for it. Cally told me where she got hers and I got all excited just to find out they don't have anymore. But I did find some. A little more than my price range,but I am willing to pay it because I really love it. I am doing valances for my kitchen with it.Maybe a matching apron so I can look all domestic and cute at the same time like June Cleaver.
Anyways, back to tithing.
Years ago ,when I was a single mom of 3, I was faced with the tough decision of buying groceries,or paying my tithing. I was always able to provide my kids with all their needs, and most of the time even their wants,but I had a tough month work wise and that months pay just wasn't enough. We barely had any food in the house. Normally I had enough food stored for months like this,but we had used it and I hadn't had the chance ,or the money, to replenish it.I had some other money but I could not risk having the lights cut off and as a woman alone with 3 kids I needed a working phone.I gathered the kids together and explained that we wouldn't be able to have our movie night(we always either rented movies,or went to the dollar theatre on friday nights),and we could not go shopping for food because I really had to pay tithing. So I did. nephi,who was 8 at the time, and newly baptized, asked how we were going to get food. I explained that if we pay our tithing that Heavenly Father will not let us go hungry.We need to have Faith and through Faith miracles happen. I promised him we would get a miracle if we did what was right. We would be provided for. (In my mind though I was terrified of my kids going hungry. I was worried deep down that having no food for my family was punishment for other things I had done in my past.)I told him that we just needed to get on our knees and ask Heavenly Father to provide mommy with more work,and hopefully some work where I could be paid right away. So we did. We knelt and said a prayer and I tucked the kids into bed. It was friday,so we were having our weekly friday night campout in the living room. The doorbell rang,I am not even kidding,less than 20 minutes after we ended the prayer. It was sister Pollack. We were serving in primary together at the time.She did not know about my financial situation-nobody did. She explained to me that there was a ton of food left over from the church function that night. ( our ward had over 700 members so it was rare to have anything left over after a function).She said my name came to her mind as she was leaving the church and she decided to bring it right over to me. She said she didn't know why but she was sure I needed it. After we brought the food in, I noticed Nephi standing there with his mouth open,jaw to the floor. And he shouted out "mom, you were right!!!it's a miracle!!!" I could not believe it either. I was simply hoping for some extra work ,which I did get,but we were provided with food immediately too. I told the kids we needed to get on our knees and thank God for this miracle. And we did. And There was so much food that it lasted about 4 weeks. I think about this every week when I am faced with my greedy thoughts(unfortunately there are many). It doesn't take long for me snap into reality and know what I need to do and I do it with a happy heart. I think about that night everyday when I am faced with problems and I remember how God works in ways that we don't even realize and can't fully comprehend in this life. Sister Pollack was in tune with the spirit and through her our prayers were answered.Not to mention all the sisters in the ward who cooked way too much food that day!!! To them I will always be grateful. Because not were we able to eat and not go hungry,but this was the moment when Nephi knew the church is true without a doubt. He told me so.I hope my kids grow up always remembering that night.For me, the best part was watching my children see their prayers anwers right before their eyes!!!